Pang -- 'John’s wit masked a deeply seated discomfort'

 encouraged him to see them. He became reunited with his son, Julian. And he experienced a lot of normal things in life. I got John walking through Central Park and out to movies. He was always driven in limos and was rather sedentary. When he was with me, we went out and did a lot of things. Though he was rich at that time, he had no money. It was all tied up, so we had to be creative. We would go out walking and have breakfasts for under two dollars at the International House of Pancakes or other musician hangouts. He was more relaxed and free to be himself.

Question: What was the real John Lennon like?

May: John was as nervous as the next person when he was going to record. At the Dakota apartment, when he met strangers, John would dazzle them with his wit. Invariably, they found him brilliant and extremely funny. That was the John of A Hard Day's Night, the John they expected to meet. It was a role he could play to the hilt. People often mistook his public performance for self-assurance, never realizing that John’s wit masked a deeply seated discomfort. John mistrusted most people. Did they want to know him because he had been a Beatle? Were they only after his money? It took him a long time to trust someone enough to let down his guard and show his gentler, more sensitive side. At his core, John was a frightened man. He dealt with his fear of women by allowing himself to be manipulated. He dealt with his fear of men by manipulating them.

Question: What control did Yoko have over John?

May: Yoko had gone through primal therapy with John, and she knew where his weak spots were. It appeared that Yoko had the power to speak directly to the deepest, most insecure part of John, and it was essential for him to do what she said, to defend her against criticism, and to believe her if she criticized him. That connection defied all logic, and it was a truth I had to accept, even though it saddened and threatened me. I wanted to do everything I could to help John trust himself. Then he would not have to turn to anyone to be told what to do.

 

Lost Lennon Interviews, Geoffrey and Brenda Giulaino, 1996, p.214

-----=-----

May Pang: John was as nervous as the next person when he was going to record. At the Dakota apartment, when he met strangers, John would dazzle them with his wit. Invariably, they found him brilliant* and extremely funny. That was the John of A Hard Day's Night, the John they expected to meet. It was a role he could play to the hilt. People often mistook his public performance for self-assurance, never realizing that John’s wit masked a deeply seated discomfort. John mistrusted most people. Did they want to know him because he had been a Beatle? Were they only after his money? It took him a long time to trust someone enough to let down his guard and show his gentler, more sensitive side. At his core, John was a frightened man. He dealt with his fear of women by allowing himself to be manipulated. He dealt with his fear of men by manipulating them.

----=----

DN was even worse. D could only be serious for about 2 minutes -- not exaggerating -- before it's back to his funny-man schtick.

* Seth on the brilliant mind tho this is one that is science-materialist oriented:

Session for R Bach and his editor Eleanor Friede -- she edited Jane's children's book  Emir's Education in the Proper Use of Magical Powers -- noted this was about Truman Capote

who she knew and who adamantly believed there was nothing beyond this

physical life.  The material here might also apply to someone like Carl

Sagan methinx.]

         

         "A brilliant mind can often turn into a black light, that blots

         our reality, and a brilliant mind, focused in one direction

only,

         also creates what it perceives, and in its intensity therefore

         exaggerates that which it perceives. So that often in

objectively

         recording facts you have instead a one-dimensional picture

         that does not represent reality, but a surface thread stretched

         through events, upon which upon which the cautious may tread.

         It is a way of making order to events that you do not

understand,

         and of assuring yourself that you have control. You are

terrified

         that you will slip from the thread, and so you make it 

         therefore heavier, and strong. And in so doing, you make sure

         that you do not look left or right, or above, much less below.

         And when you think you are looking below, and bringing up

         information from beneath, you are instead merely following

         the ravelings from your small thread. The brilliant mind has been

         used by many, not as a method of perfection, but as a black light:

         to blot out illumination, and it dazzles others, but it blinds the

         self."

         --Seth